


death in the family

by TheEagleGirl



Series: tumblr prompts [1]
Category: A Song of Ice and Fire - George R. R. Martin, Game of Thrones (TV)
Genre: Angst with a Happy Ending, F/M, basically i was sent an innocuous prompt and made it into tragedy because i love making jon suffer, it's a lil ficlet of angst, takes place in canon
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-12-13
Updated: 2019-12-13
Packaged: 2021-02-26 02:41:09
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 505
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/21776161
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/TheEagleGirl/pseuds/TheEagleGirl
Summary: Jon Snow loses his family one by one.Aka 5 times Jon hears that his family is dead and one time that he finds out they're alive.
Relationships: Jon Snow & Starks, Jon Snow/Sansa Stark (if you squint)
Series: tumblr prompts [1]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1569355
Comments: 14
Kudos: 79





	death in the family

**Author's Note:**

  * For [afewreelthoughts](https://archiveofourown.org/users/afewreelthoughts/gifts).



> prompt from @afewreelthoughts on tumblr: Jon Snow, 5 + 1: "firsts," whatever that means to you
> 
> so obviously, that means Jon Snow and the first time he hears about each of his family members dying vs the one time he finds a family member is alive

Jon Snow loses his family one by one. 

The first time, it’s his father. Jeor Mormont breaks the news as gently as he can, but it’s difficult for a man like him to be gentle, and Jon feels the world shift beneath his feet before the words even register. He returns to his small cell before he collapses, weeps bitter tears where no one but Ghost can see. He nearly breaks his vows in grief and anger.

The second time, he cries for Arya. His little sister. His other half. _There is no word of Arya in King’s Landing,_ Robb writes, _and though my mother holds out hope, I fear she may be dead._ Jon cannot imagine a world without Arya, cannot imagine not being able to muss her hair and tease her. He’s not certain he remembers the next few days, only that when he emerges from his stupor, the world is darker without her.

The third and fourth times, it is his brothers Bran and Rickon. Jon is numb when he hears the news. He wants to kill Theon Greyjoy. He wants to sleep and never wake. He wants to shout at the gods. _How? HOW?_ Rickon was just a _baby_ **,** and Bran a helpless boy. _How could you let them die?_ Jon wants to scream, but instead he cloaks himself in silence and pain.

He does scream the fifth time, when he hears of Robb’s death. Robb, whose crib he shared. Robb, who he envied and loved in equal measure. Robb, his perfect brother, the one he would have died for. Jon screams and screams into his hands, bites at his knuckles till they bleed so his brothers in black will not hear, and dimly wonders if he cares whether they do or not. 

**+1**

When he awakens, Jon is dimly aware of the cold, and the smell of burning. For a long time after he is brought back, they are the only sensations he knows. He feels little, tastes little, sleeps less. It is as though he is still a dead man in living flesh, and it does not occur to Jon to mind very much. 

He feels nothing, until the day the southern gates open and his sister Sansa arrives, beaten and battered, in a torn grey cloak on a dying horse. When she runs into his arms, Jon remembers how to cry, and they sink to the icy ground together, wrapped in the embrace of two people who know what it is to lose it all.

“Arya is alive,” Sansa tells him later, fierce and cold the way their father once was. “And Bran and Rickon, too. We’re going to get them back, Jon, and we’re going to make everyone who hurt us pay.”

For the first time in years, a feeling unfurls in Jon’s chest. It’s feeble and uncertain, and it takes Jon all night to figure out what it is. It is only when the sun rises over the ice that he realizes what it is. 

Hope.

**Author's Note:**

> if you enjoyed this, please leave a comment below! <3
> 
> you can find me on tumblr @ladystarks!


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